No.22
Paige is relaxing in the back room of No.22 with a magazine when the computer buzzes.

PAIGE: Guys, the laptop's ringing! Hello?!

The laptop continues to beep, so Paige goes over to it and answers the call. An unfamiliar face is on the screen, lying on a bed.

PAIGE: Hi.
PIPER: Hi...?
PAIGE: Um, who are you?
PIPER: I'm Piper....
PAIGE:(surprised and a bit awkward) Ah!...OK...let me just get someone.
PIPER: Sorry, who are you?
PAIGE: Uh...I'm Paige...your sister I guess. It's nice to meet you.
PIPER: Yeah, sorry, I thought you were like a really weird looter or something!
PAIGE: That'd be awkward!

There is an awkward silence.

PAIGE: Hey, look, no- one's here right now...Brad's in the shower, he shouldn't be too long...hopefully.
PIPER: So, how is everyone?
PAIGE: Yeah, yeah, everyone's great!
PIPER: Um, I heard there was a tornado?
PAIGE: Oh! Oh, god, yes, that was horrible, but everyone's fine, everyone's safe and sound, except Granddad got hurt, but, you know, he should be alright.
PIPER: Grandad?
PAIGE: Oh, no, not your granddad...my granddad on my mum's side. *Your* granddad is fine.
PIPER: Oh.

Another awkward silence descends.

PAIGE: So, how's Toronto?
PIPER: Vancouver.
PAIGE: Vancouver, yes.
PIPER: Canada's good, it's beautiful, mountainous, lots of tuques...
PAIGE: What?
PIPER:(pointing to her hat) Beanies.
PAIGE: Oh, oh right. I love Canada.
PIPER: You've been?
PAIGE: Yeah, yeah, to Whistler actually. I met a really cute hockey player there and he took me to this amazing retreat up in the mountains and...anyway, um...have you seen much ice- hockey?
PIPER: No, not really. By the time the players actually get undressed to enough to throw a punch, it just seems kind of sad. But...(awkwardly)...it's good that *you* like it.
PAIGE: So, why Canada?
PIPER: Oh, tornadoes, I just can't stand them. (pause) So, how's Josh and Imogen? Giving you any hassles?
PAIGE: Er...no, nothing I can't handle! Josh is probably out helping clean up after the tornado, and hopefully Imogen is not fighting with Amber again...
PIPER: Imogen fighting? I am officially feeling very uninformed.
PAIGE: Um, I'm sorry, I just...I just assumed...
PIPER: Oh no, it's all good. I'm a family embarrassment - hence Canada!
PAIGE: Um...
PIPER: That was a joke - kidding! I thought I was trying to be funny by making an abandoned child joke but it's not the right audience.
PAIGE: No, listen, I'm sure they were going to tell you, but since the storm and then the Adelaide fiasco, it's just been...
PIPER: The what?
PAIGE: Oh...Brad and my mum, when they came looking for me, there was a kiss or something.
PIPER: Something?
PAIGE: Months ago...look, I wasn't even in the picture then at that point, I was off being that abandoned child like you...well, not like you because you have a family that love you very much. I am going to stop talking now.

(long pause)

PIPER: Dad's having a long shower, eh?
PAIGE: The longest! Where is that guy?
PIPER: I might just call back later then. I've got some things I need to do.
PAIGE: Yeah! Yeah, sure, things. Listen, it's been really, really nice chatting.
PIPER: Yeah! It was. We should do it again...some time.
PAIGE: Definitely.

There is an awkward pause.

PAIGE:(waves) OK, see ya!

She shuts the laptop. In Canada, Paige pulls her beanie over her eyes and groans.